Faith + Life

A Wal-Mart worker died early Friday after an “out-of-control” mob of frenzied shoppers smashed through the Long Island store’s front doors and trampled him, police said.

New York Daily News, Nov. 28, 2008

It’s the biggest shopping day of the year.  According to CNN/Money, retails sales for Black Friday 2009 were somewhere around $10.66 billion. Most of the frenzy seems to hedge around deeply discounted sale items and the “must have” electronic gift items. At least, that’s where the conversations were headed among my extended family on Thanksgiving Day.

Black Friday

My own experience with early morning shopping has some of the drama of Black Friday 2008, but none of the death, thankfully. I remember the years working in retail and dreading Black Friday.  Each year as the football games wound down my Thanksgiving joy turned into dread. I sensed disconnect between thankfulness, my own faith experience and what I was about to experience as a part of the culture of Christmas.

Perhaps my dislike of Black Friday stems from having to deal with over-motivated shoppers.

Perhaps it is that I link Christmas with something far more valuable than stuff.

Frenzy

What is it about shopping, sales, gifts, and gadgets that gets people into such a mental state that they would trample another person to death just to save a few dollars?

I’m cool with competition…even physically demanding games.

That rebound is MINE!

What I don’t get the mad dash for

• video games
• televisions, and
• toys.

The frenzy that I have observed seems to be more about

1. greed,
2. lust, and
3. strife

than about the grace-filled images of the Christmas story.

Turn that Frown Up-side Down

Standing in the path of a cultural roller coaster is a dangerous game…kinda like playing “chicken” on I-95 or I-35 or I-405… You get the picture…  There are times when that has been necessary.  Fortunately, for you and me, this is not the Civil Rights movement or a struggle for Constitutional preservation.

I propose that the goal is both simpler and more daunting.

How do you gently turn

• greed into generosity
• lust into contentment, and
• strife into peace?

I think there’s a way to turn that frown up-side down…without getting thrown under the bus.

Be Covert

That’s right.  Hide in plain sight.  If you prefer

• generosity
• contentment, and
• peace,

then you are the enemy.  If they see you coming, you’ll never catch up with them.  They might even……

Yeeesh!

You’ve to be covert if you want to…

Subvert

Now that you’ve built rapport with the people you want to influence (and they don’t see you for the change-agent that you are), it’s time get to work.

How?

By gently undermining the principles of the Frenzy.

Remember, if they know where you are and what you are doing…. It won’t be pretty.

Here are the three primary ways to subvert appetites of the Frenzy.

1. Respond with Generosity,
2. Model Contentment,
3. Practice Peace

Respond with Generosity

It’s counter-intuitive.  They’ll never see it coming!

Actually, there’s a bit of science behind this one. (Note 1)

It seems that we may be hard-wired with something call “mirror neurons.” These neurons seem to want to respond to others just like they approach us. I yell at you and you automatically yell at me. I hit you and you hit me. The crowd buys some whiz-bang doo-dad and you and I buy it, too.

Intentionally meet greed with generosity.

Sure, it’s a long, hard road to travel. The approach may fail more than it succeeds.

Remember, it is subversion, that is, undermining a principle, not a frontal assault.

Model Contentment

Are you content?

Are you content with your life? Your stuff? Your relationships? Your career?

To continue our subversive approach, meet the appetites of lust with contentment.

“Oh…you got a new FancySwagMobile? I’m happy for you. Me? No, I’m happy with my…..”

“Oh…you’re tired of Ms. WasDreamyLastWeekbutSheDoesn’tLikeSpinach? Well, Ms. ___ and I are very happy.” (It helps is you and Mr/Ms _____ actually have a healthy relationship.)

CAVEAT: You must actually learn to be content with your circumstances to pull this one off. (Note: contentment is not complacency!)

Practice Peace

This means WAR!!!!

War and Peace?

No, you don’t have to read Tolstoy’s big book.

You do need the commitment it takes to fight a war in order to practice peace.

Think about that for a moment…

Effectively practicing peace requires the same commitment as fighting a war. It might even contribute to your untimely death. It just depends on whose freeway you’re standing.

Don’t take my word for it. Do a little digging on your own. History is filled with the ends of those who championed peace.  Jesus, Gandhi, and Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., are just three examples.

Remember, the goal is to be covert to subvert the social trends of greed, lust, and strife, in order to…

Revert

Okay…the idea of humanity reverting to a condition other than greed, lust, and strife is a stretch. It’s a stretch because our history is filled with those three conditions: greed, lust, and strife.

This argument is not so much for reversion as it is for conversion.

Of the many definitions of that very loaded word, here’s the one that I like the best:

…a change of attitude or viewpoint.

That’s a daunting task. Don’t bite it all off all at once. That’s the point of being covert to subvert in order torevert…convert people’s perspective with

• generosity,
• contentment, and
• peace.

Watch some football. Eat some rich and sweet foods. Then, get your game on and go confuse a few mirror neurons!

BTW, I’d love to hear your Black Friday stories and the lessons you’ve learned…as well as your feelings and perspective on this post.

Don’t forget to comment!

Blessings,

/jmt

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1. Lindstrom, Martin. buyology: truth and lies about why we buy. Doubleday: New York. 2008.