Values are fine things to have until you have to use them. That’s when you find out how expensive they are. That’s also when you find out if you’re willing to live them.
As Aubrey Malphurs suggested in his book Values Based Leadership, you should make sure all of your sacred cows really are sacred, and not just cows.
Just a few days ago, I published my values on this blog. A few days later I tweeted about the Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Not much. Just a few quotes.
Then this week’s circumstances hit.
My wife is ill and very pregnant. I work forty-five minutes away. Friends can help…and they have! (THANK YOU!) But…there are some things ya just gotta be there for…
The Conflict
This month’s fight is a multi-round bout between Value #2 and my fears about consequences at Work. I know you’ve seen that fight before.
Here’s the card:
Value #2: People Matter
vs.
Missing Work… a lot of it.
Rubber Meets Road
I’ve spent much of my adult life comforting people with sick and dying family/friends. I always tell them that People Matter. I tell them that the Relationships are the essence of why we’re here. Oh…and “at the end of life, you’ll never wish you’d gone to work more…”
I’ve a newly minted appreciation for what I encouraged those people to do…to give up, potentially.
Three days’ leave for the death of an immediate family member is generous? It seems to be a common practice.
Getting fired because you’re child is ill and in a hospital 100 miles from home is unjust.
Worrying that there are consequences for taking care of your spouse / child / parent / sibling is debilitating.
Everyone who has lost a job because they were doing the right thing…and then lost more…financially …they deserve a crown.
Then I think of those who gave so much more to live their values:
- Dr. King
- Mother Teresa
- Gandhi
- Jesus
- Maybe someone you know?
If it works in ink….
Never come lightly to the page.
That’s advice from Stephen King about writing. I echo that here and embellish a bit regarding values:
Never approach a values statement lightly. If it works in ink, make sure it works in blood.
…and in sweat and tears, too.
There is no greater love than to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.
(Jn. 15.13 NLT)
Talk Back!
Where have you experienced conflict with your values?
__________
Photo credit: http://www.flickr.com/people/modomatic/
Scripture quote from Holy Bible. New Living Translation copyright © 1996, 2004 by Tyndale Charitable Trust. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers.
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I hope you enjoy your time on the site and that something in these pages encourages your journey along the Way of Jesus. All thoughts here are my own and do not necessarily reflect the thoughts of others or of organizations with which I am affiliated. 
I’m at ease about my situation with respect to work, now. That wasn’t always the case. All I’m losing is a little money, which in no case can ever approach the value of caring for my wife. My values won the bout because 1) they are foundational, 2) I worked hard to set the stage with my employer and openly communicate about the situation, and 3) we have support from family and friends.
Are your values the foundation of your life?
Do you communicate them well?
Do you have a network that supports them?
My new values are growing as we speak.
Prior to now, I’m not sure I had many values worth using as a foundation. When I did, it led to nothing but accelerated successes followed by profound failures.
The new “Uppie” is being born.
The message: “Believe”.
Fortunately, this message can exist in any facet of my life. So my career, all be it one I could do without, can be a proving ground of sorts. A blank canvas I’ve been given to paint.
And as for a network?
As I’ve said many times, I have complete faith in you and thankfulness for you. You continued words always move me to thought. Your friendship always moves me to be more.
.-= Eric Upton´s last blog ..Maryland Zoo partners with the B&O Railroad, Maryland Science Center, and Port Discovery for the Months of January and February. =-.
Uppie,
Thank you for your encouragement. I know we’re both at a point in our lives when reflecting, learning, growing and moving forward are important. BTW, keep up the Nike+ reports!
I’ve always wanted growth, but I never really had a foundation that was firm enough to support growth or the focus I needed. Finally distilling “priceless” values has increased my vision… and given feet to my “why.”
Interestingly, I’ve seen lots of people and organization without expensive values. Where there is no vision [and values]….
Work, where ever that may be, is a great laboratory for our values. In my case, and in yours I think, those values are faith-based. I’ve said it over and over, if you follow Jesus you have to take him to work with you. That’s where I have always found the most challenges to my values.
What are some of your newly uncovered foundational values?
Blessings,
/jmt